Imposter Syndrome: How I Worked Through It 🎭
As you know, I began asking Reiki to clear everything within me that caught my attention. And somewhere in this work with triggers, I stumbled upon imposter syndrome 💥
Many of you have experienced this: you’re an expert with experience and education, yet inside, there’s this nagging feeling that “it’s all wrong”, that you’re delivering low-quality work, and soon everyone will “find out the truth” 🕵️♂️
How did I discover it?
First, I noticed the physical sensations that came with this state:
🦵 Weakness—wobbly, shaky legs and knees
😰 Fear of judgment—as if someone’s watching and condemning me (but who? And from where?)
💀 Feeling like I’m walking on bloody stumps—as if my legs were cut off at the knees
🎢 Instability—like I can’t stand firmly on my own
What did the metaphorical cards reveal? 🃏✨
I drew three cards, and here’s what they told me:
1️⃣ A clown placing a ladder against a tower 🤡
That’s me. No audience, the ladder leads nowhere, and I’m just a clown people might laugh at. It reminded me of my work as a programmer—like I’m not a professional but a joke.
2️⃣ A mermaid come ashore 🧜♀️🌊
She’s too exposed, crossing her own boundaries, unprotected… belonging neither to the sea nor the land.
3️⃣ A person waving their arms at a lighthouse 🏃♂️💡
The lighthouse represents others (like programming article authors). They shine their light, but aimlessly—the beam never lands where it should. And I’m the one waving my arms, dreaming of shining just like them… even if it’s just as pointless 😆
From this, I concluded that imposter syndrome isn’t a “syndrome” at all—it’s the truth.
🚫 Don’t go where I don’t belong 📍
🚫 Don’t be a clown, and don’t even try to climb onto the stage 🤡
🚫 And don’t chase after people who are just doing their own messy thing 🧭
Want to explore your own hidden blocks like this? DM me → @karmapema_1108