To Lose in Order to Find

There is such - Reiki crisis, it should be on the 2nd level - for beginners.

What is it?
It sounds like “it’s all meaningless, I’m doing nothing, I need to live like all normal people”. But. At the time I had Reiki 2, I didn’t have it.
When you do Reiki, it doesn’t last long, - bcz you know you’ll meet it and your teacher is here ⚡

❓When Was My Crisis?
That crisis I had had it in 2011, when I give away all my decks of Tarot cards, disconnected from all my aquentancies who were is astrology, Tarot, magic rituals, Latin poems, etc. Removed esoteric marketplace accounts with history and rating )
Though I couldn’t fire the Elder Futhark Runes.
Couldn’t have betrayed them.

I had no teacher at that time and spent in my crisis for nearly 7 years 😱

👌**“Normal” life. For who?** (not for me)
I lived the “normal girl” life.

  • gym
  • work
  • cooking
  • marriage

Then I understood that the life I was not fulfilling 😔
It wasn’t normal for me. It was boredom. Empty. Lostness. I decided to take my life under my control and as I couldn’t rely on psychologists, I went to psychology institute.

Innovative Pchychotechnologies Institute
I attended the Institute on weekends and was very glad that the diploma named “Innovation Psychotechnology” contained lessons like “Alchemy”, “Reincarnation”, “God”, “Consciousness Levels” 😇
A normal diploma with such lessons under the hood 👍😍
That’s what I liked in the official education.
I liked that I was there among my own.

My fears were not empty
I was hiding myself.
I even was hiding from myself that I was hiding.
I was afraid of ostracism.
Now I know that in my situation it was possible, - bcz my clan decided to drown me in negativity so that someone else in clan - can survive 🙄
A lot of negative things were possible until I cleaned my clan this year.
And - yes - a lot of negative things already have happened.
I’m such a broken many times and fixed many times person.

To be for Others?
Once I decided that I cannot hide anymore and cannot life another imaginary girl’s life.
Usually that created by others image was comfortable for others and not comfortable for me)
For now it’s hard to concious in it - I believed them, but they just used me, and it percepts as a betrayal.
I see now how it happens almost everywhere 🤔
It’s not normal to have this normality.

Seing my Fears
To keep pretending to view that there’s no subtle esoteric - were stupid.
Then I realized, that I was hiding my skills and attitude to esoteric.
Then I realised that I’m afraid of somebody who is judging me for it and that I’m trying to hide my nature.
I lied (?) to myself that I can live without it, that’s not important part of my life 🤥 And the lie was subtle.
I realised that I kept doing it under the covers 🫢

My 2018 was rich on hard decisions.
I went to a yearly systematic hipnosis course.
And a management education course that lasted a year.
I divorced, changed the job.
Still a lot to do for me, but happiest ever.

2019 - **2022 **
Covid, Huawei, freelance, startups, and move to Cyprys.
JapJi transmission, Blessing of the Universe, Shaman, Reiki-1, Buddhism initiation.

… and now? You know where am I.

Subscribe @karma_pema_1108

Looks like a nostalgy before my birthday in the end of April 🙄

Now I’m cooking the** Thursday** Black Salt 😐
It’s specifically designed to clean from parasites, attachments, self-induced and other-people induced negativity ⚫

So if you need to clean yourself from unknown origin pain in the body and bad luck - I have Reiki and Salt in my belt 😊

Subscribe @karma_pema_1108